Almost there...

Well, in the past six months I have encountered alot. I had not taken any education classes until July 1st of this year. Since then I have gotten more than half way through my graduate program. It feels good to have that all behind me. I just checked my e-mail though and there definitely is going to be a crunch going on for the next week. I have to revise a research paper, create an integrated unit, and create two curricular units - this on top of one of the busiest times of the season at work. The five weeks of vacation are going to feel real good...and I think even the semester after that will be a nice change...two of my three classes will be in my content area (the past six months have been "education" overload). However, even though I am not actually teaching or observing right now I think the most current experience helps to further the sense of work ethic that I will clearly need to have when getting into the school I want to teach at...

Oh Goodie...A Personal Slave!

That was basically the idea that I got of the teacher's reaction to me observing her. When I originally started there she had informed me that it would not be me just sitting there and taking notes (which unfortunately has been the experience of some of my peers). I would be running copies and doing other fairly menial tasks throughout the day. In fact, the copier pictured here is where I spent a significant amount of time while "observing". The teacher would use these workbooks and she would make copies of them to distribute to the class (this was a way to avoid buying textbooks as well). She even said that she wasn't sure what she would do once I left. Obviously, she would have to make the copies herself...but given her busy schedule this would only put even more constraint on her time. Perhaps she has by now found another student who can do these things. The experience I had was worth it though. Besides, when at this copier I had the opportunity to chat with other teachers, the janitor, and the office people...so it wasn't a lost cause at all.

Technology and me...

I know that having a good knowledge base in technology is only going to help me but boy is this stuff somewhat impossible sometimes. I am incredibly interested in technology's effect on society, culture, and learning. I would like to do further work in my content area towards that end. It is somewhat ironic though that I am fairly technologically inept. I just had to do a Powerpoint presentation for a class and am sure that anyone looking at it will think that I did not put much effort into it. That is truly farther from the truth. Yet, just a few years ago I know that I would not have been able to do even half the stuff that I can do now. As long as I keep an open mind I know that I will do OK. Besides, it may later give me more of an opportunity with many kids who may be more techno-savvy than I.

Teacher as Panopticon

So this is the view I would often have of my small classroom while observing/ teaching. There was only 14 students in the entire class (and this was the entire high school class)! Having a class like this really gave me an opportunity to learn such specific things. True - it wasn't a public school and it wasn't a large class (like the ones I will probably be teaching later) but it still gave me an "inside" view of how individuals learn and how one might have a significant impact on them. I had remarked earlier on the "gaze" of the students and I would like to briefly return to that here...As can be ascertained from this picture, all the students' eyes are to be trained on me (or whatever else might be in their line of sight - including the backs of fellow students' heads). Whenever possible I think it is much more beneficial for the students to be looking at each other and hence truly interacting with each other. Methods of teaching which extensively use what might be referred to as the "panopticon method" do poorly in helping the student truly learn....it is instead just a reassertion of authority. Authority which is empty of reason and purpose is ultimately useless. A teacher should recognize him or her self as the authority in the classroom to an extent - but it should not be this authority by itself which directs (or even dictates) the flow of learning within the classroom...

Social Wealth

In about 45 minutes I pick up an individual whom has been labeled as developmentally disabled and we get to go to Crossgates Mall on Thanksgiving weekend! Apparently he wants to go to a place called Build a Bear. In this store you get to design your own teddy bear for later snuggling at home. It should be alot of fun to go to the shopping mall on the busiest weekend of the year. I hate shopping malls!
I started working for Catholic Charities Disabilities Services about 10 months ago and tried to quit about 6 months ago. They just keep sucking me back in. Besides, how could I quit? I originally got the job because I was told that it would count for my observation hours, but when I got into school it was a whole different story. Now I just do it as a small contribution to a few individuals in the community. It is good because besides helping them - I also learn more about myself and the nature of learning and dare I say "abstract" thought processes. It can be quite interesting to talk with these individuals (and when I say "abstract" I simply mean that they do not neatly conform to the ways most of us communicate - they do not see the world like we do (then again does anybody see the world the same - There is an old philosophical question which asks : "Is my red the same as your red?" "Ultimately, how can we really know?"))....
So now I am off to the Build a Bear store...wish me luck...

The gaze

This is a picture of the students' field of vision on a typical day of class. Notice the things which they are looking at and those which they are not. They are looking at the classical chalkboard (or here - eraserboard) and the teacher's desk. Granted - the teacher I was observing (as well as myself) did not sit at the desk much during classtime. Both of us engaged the students while standing up and walking around the room. This is very helpful in trying to engage the students in such a way that they are connecting with the teacher. But what about each other? Is it important for them to engage with each other? Without me elaborating on that at all I think it can be said that students working together in different ways is clearly beneficial to them. The skills they develop here will have to help them in the future.
Doesn't the "gaze" have much to do with this? People now more than ever are visual learners. Instead of making the teacher the focal point in the classroom - when possible - I had the class get into a circle with myself at one of the same desks that they sit at. I tried to guide rather than dictate the flow of learning. In circle formation, with everyone's gaze focused on everyone else...people were much more involved. It was harder to not participate or nod out of the conversation. People felt much more a part of a class - as though they had a serious hand in it. They were part of the process of instruction rather than simply the brunt of it. They were constructors rather than receivers.

Giving Thanks

Well, today is Thanksgiving of course so I felt that I should mention some things that I might be thankful for. I guess I would have to first say that I am mostly thankful for the way I was brought up. It was not an easy life (nor is it now), but it definitely keeps on getting easier. I think my life has really formulated me to be a person that can have some good effects on the people around me. I have learned how to get through some tough stuff and I have had such a rich variety of experiences along the way. I have worn the hats of a cook, a salesman, a factory worker, a bartender, a waiter, a soldier, a tutor, and a mentor, but most of all - I have enjoyed just being a friend. I came to realize that kids really are what this world is all about and that many of them probably have to make some of the same decisions I made and may have even made some of the mistakes that I have made.
When you have no money and lots of time you tend to think alot about things. I would see people around me that had money - but they never seemed REAL...actually they seemed unhappy most of the time. Wealth. What is wealth? Is wealth the purchasing power that one has? Is wealth how much money or investments one has? What is money? Is not money just an abstraction of value - perhaps a form of stored value? What then is it REALLY good for? What is investment? Is it simply putting money somewhere where it can grow into more money? Is it like having a garden? Can you pick and eat your money before the first frost of the year? Probably not - it remains an abstraction. OR perhaps - distraction. Why not invest in something which is not an abstraction? Why not invest in something tangible? Something real? I have decided to invest in humans - they seem to provide the best return. But, like money, one may certainly get greedy when investing in humans...
I am thankful for being such a greedy person.